Hiiii, My Name Is...

Usuallly blogs would start with a cute little intro..but to be completely honest, I’m horrible with introductions. The whole “Who am I” reflection always made me uncomfortable growing up. This was mostly due to not knowing who I actually was. So for an introduction to start this blog, I’ll resort to my usual line when meeting people. “Hiiii I’m Reej (:”. For those who know me, you already heard that line in a very corky, high pitch voice followed by a smile. People have always seen be as this person whose is always happy, and “full of light”. I’ve been told that I’m just such a happy person for as long as I can remember, and I’m not denying it...but I know that I have not been fully honest with myself until now. 

I’ve always have been a guarded up individual. Even in my bios for social media, I tend to keep it very minimal. “Sudanese. Columbia/NCCU alumna.” Followed by some quote relating to peace love and happiness. Prior to undergrad,I was often bullied for many reasons. This took a toll on my self esteem and confidence, causing myself to distance from others and refusing to form relationships. I was scared of being judged and be labeled as "annoying" or weird".When introducing myself in classes in undergrad, I would tend to keep it one word or not even speak due to that.I tried to change that once I got to Grad school, by participating and reaching out to make friends first, and although I struggled with putting myself out there (or accepting friends) I’m beyond grateful for the friends that I’ve made as well as the courage built.

During my time in New York, Like all my colleagues who moved there, I learned a lot about myself....especially with what I like/ don’t like. One main thing that was taken from my experience from Columbia was accountability. I always stated that I was "healing" and "growing" but never took the steps needed to fully heal within myself. I often relied on other people's validation and advice to leading my own life and when those I depended on were not available, I would often get anxious and scared in my decision making. Before the pandemic hit, I was learning more about myself and becoming more independent in my decision making. Once Covid hit, I moved back with my family and had to learn more about myself during a unusual time. Although Covid has caused more harm than good, Im grateful that staying at home forced me to learn about myself. This made me realize that I was living a "toxic positivity" lifestyle and I was not being honest with myself.

These last few months, I started my Spiritual Journey (which will most likely be the next blog I speak on). I started becoming more authentic in everything that I do. I started #ReviewsWithReej to walk into my purpose as part of my journey to being accountable and authentic. Along with #ReviewsWithReej, I started this blog to finally speak my thoughts on the world. To be passionate, to be real, to be....Reej. I hope you join me on this journey of me blossoming and healing and know that even you have a purpose. You are needed. You are loved. You have something that makes you different than everyone else. You are you and no one can ever be you.

So to end this long blog, allow me to reintroduce myself. My name is Areej. I sometimes go by Reej and Im a soul whose finding my place in this world while being authentic and accountable. Thank you so much for joining me on this journey. Much Love.